And so the happiness project begins….
My bffl gave me a book and asked me to join a Happiness Project group on facebook. I immediately thought to myself, “I NEED this! Whatever it is!”. I’ve grown accustomed to putting everyone before myself, to the point I am non existent to myself. “That’s got to change, and whatever this Happiness project is it’s worth a try.” And try I must! So I began reading The Happiness Project and saw a lot of myself in Gretchen. Her goals were similar to mine in my happiness quest, so I decided to start with those and added a couple of my own. This was a year dedication, each month had a specific goal, once I had all my goals down the next question was… when would I start? September was around the corner and it would be perfect because my 29th birthday, I was moving, my partners and I were starting a business, and my son was starting an online school at home. I would accomplish my goals each month, documenting each phase and see how my life had changed by my 30th birthday. Perfect! I hadn’t been this excited about anything since we started the business and and Mad Men, I knew this was going to be big!
I wrote out my list, the 12 goals in my happiness project.
1. September -Boost Energy
- Go to sleep earlier
- Exercise better
- Toss, Restore, Organize
- Tackle a nagging task
- Act more energetic
- Take “ME” time, do hair and nails (girl stuff)
2. October- Remember Love (Marriage)
- Quit nagging (a toughie)
- Don’t expect a praise or appreciation (easy)
- Fight right (don’t understand)
- No dumping
- Give proofs of love (Hubs will appreciate this one)
3. November-Aim higher (Work)
- Be proactive in blog
- be creative in homeschool
- be more active in The Pax Life
4. December- Lighten Up (Parenthood)
- Acknowledge the reality of peoples’ feelings
- Be a treasure house of happy memories (Project Life, take pics, create traditions)
- Take time for projects (make a list of things I like to do)
I never thought I had a hobby other than writing poetry, and I hadn’t done that in years. So when asked what do I enjoy doing, I never had an answer…sad, I thought to myself. There had to be something I enjoyed doing….I decided to start by making a list of things I like:
Things I like:
- Home decorating
- crafts
- cooking/baking
- gardening (really just watching things grow)
- scrapbooking
I was excited that I found some things that I liked and would like to do. Most of which I never did, like crafts or scrapbooking, but I was always attracted to the thought of it.
5. January- Be Serious About Leisure (Play)
- Find more fun
- Take time to be silly
- Go off the path
- start a collection
6. February- Make Time for Friendship
- Remember birthdays
- Be generous
- Show up
- Don’t gossip
- Make 3 new friends
This one I definitely needed to put a star next to. With the craziness of life, I let my friendships fall to the back ground. Luckily, some of my friends understood, others didn’t and those relationships fell. The ones that stuck around, I needed to show my appreciation towards them. Even though life is hectic (especially as a stay at home mom of 3 boys..) I needed to find the time for friends.
7. March- Buy Some Happiness (Money)
- Indulge in a modest splurge
- Buy needful things
- Spend out
- Give something up
8. April- Pursue a Passion (Hobbies)
- Create a binder of clippings of home decor (pinterest)
- Create a list of projects I want to accomplish before I turn 30
- Garden
- Go on a photo walk with the hubs
- Bake more
9. May- Tap into Art
- Be more creative
- Take an art class
- Study an Artist and go to a museum
- Take up an instrument
10. June- Be Fearless
- walk over the brooklyn bridge
- jump into the ocean
11. July-Travel
- Go to a new place and become a true tourist
12. August- Boot Camp Perfect Happiness
So there is my list. As I wrote these down I thought of side ideas I wanted to add like:
- Start a Project Life, keep a journal (something a used to do but hadn’t in years)
- Read a book once a month (we’ll see how far I get with this one)
- Create goal notes with the kids
- volunteer once a month
- try new things
- do more home videos
- Run/walk for causes (train for a 10k)
Having these goals written down really helped me get started and get excited about getting them done. I immediately found an organization to sign the family up to volunteer, Cradle to Crayons, and booked us for the next 2 months.
On September 1st, I began my happiness project. We had moved the week prior so, Toss, Restore, Organize was done! I made a point of doing my hair and getting dolled up which apparently shocked my family. Toky kept telling me I was buutiful and looked like snow white, and my husband just kept looking at me. At a certain point, I thought something was wrong. I shocked my sister as I came down the stairs, to a point where I thought to myself, they must be exaggerating. I received compliments through out the evening and on to the next day when we went to the mall and a young girl kept starring and complimenting me. I was a little embarrassed but the attention made me remember I am more than just a mom, I am a beautiful woman, with a beautiful family. I’m an entrepreneur, I’m creative, I’m intelligent, I’m funny, I’m Sophia. I had been so lost in “Mom Role” that I didn’t remember who I was 4 years ago. It was amazing how one weekend with the happiness project had already had a positive impact towards my feelings about myself. This is going to be an interesting year….
